The Dizzy Diaries

 The end of last week was tough emotionally and mentally. I had some tough chats and there are some important decisions I'll have to make in the future. After my tilt table test in October 2022, I scheduled an appointment with neurology in March 2023. The neurologist didn't have any answers for me and we tried a variety of medicine that would treat migraines and their symptoms. One annoyance my neurologist didn't understand: I don't experience migraines. I've had a few in my life, but migraines and headaches aren't my number one symptom and don't usually affect me on a day-to-day basis. After seeing him for 6-7 months, I was able to schedule an MRI.  The MRI was scheduled for November. The day came and I was so nervous: what happens if something is affecting my brain??  I have a pretty big history of trauma associated with neurologists, brain issues and conditions, and now MRIs. My dad was diagnosed with a brain tumor in the early 2000s and he spent much of ...

At this stage in my treatment, my doctor sent out many referrals. I was set to see a cardiologist, neurologist, and otolaryngology (ENT). On September 19, 2022, I was scheduled for a Tilt Table Test. These tests are performed by cardiologists and are used to evaluate unexplained episodes of dizziness, lightheadedness, and/or fainting. The test monitors your heart rate and blood pressure while trying to trigger symptoms - so fun.  This was my view as I entered the room. A hard, flat table with straps... The only people allowed in the room were myself and the nurse administering the test (bye Skyler!). Of course, I needed an IV, and those who know me well know my fear of IVs. Tattoo needles? Fine. Needles for piercings? Also fine! IVs? HARD PASS. So once the IV was in after 15 minutes of me crying and panicking and putting it off, we could begin the test. The purpose of the IV is to deliver medications and fluids if needed. I was also covered with electrode patches on my chest, arms,...

Summer 2022 - a look through my notes app June 30 woke up with internal shakes - took 4-hour nap after work and felt better July 9 dizziness worsened when driving - took 2 Dramamine dizziness started at the top of head and washed over me when my head moved felt faint and lightheaded no relief after 5-hour nap - 3 ibuprofen no relief after water, caffeine, or food July 10 woke up dizzy Gatorade helped but dizziness returned around 8:00pm July 11 started the day with Gatorade - no dizziness! the dizziness started around noon July 16 dizziness started a round 2:00pm feeling shaky and lightheaded Gatorade in the afternoon - relief around 3:00pm July 18 stayed home from work due to dizziness lightheadedness eye shaking in reaction to loud noises internal tremors brain fog July 19 extreme dizziness throughout the day - worst in a while lips tingling brain fog reaction to noises vibrations through my body as I move my eyes That is just an excerpt... I continued to monitor my symptoms daily be...

As I sit here on my couch, my emotions are overwhelming. The first two months of the year have been a blur. The year started strong, I was feeling well and managed to go on a much-needed vacation with my mom. But upon returning home, the symptoms came back worse than ever. It's hard to think back, in more ways than one, on the days I've felt myself, as they are few and far between.  As a millennial people pleaser, being stuck on the couch, not working, and not taking care of daily chores is tough. Laundry piles up, dishes sit in the sink...and I continue to sit. This post is not me trying to seek sympathy but to express my feelings and emotions in real-time. To be real and vulnerable and to document my journey.  I'm waiting to schedule an appointment with a new otolaryngologist. In mid-February, I was seen by a vestibular specialist and pointed in the direction of Superior Canal Dehiscence Syndrome (SCDS). The otolaryngologist would perform a hearing test and schedule a CT ...

My life has turned into lots of days spent sitting on the couch. It's easy to let the grief, sadness, and depression join me.  I've created a small goal for myself as we make our way through 2024 - enjoy the little things. Take time to appreciate the things that make me smile and help me get through each day, whether or not my day is filled with dizziness.  If you know me, you know I love animals, especially mine. Skyler and I have quite the crew and we're very much outnumbered. When we first met in 2018, I was living alone in Lawrence with my two guinea pigs, Sonny and Jasper, and Miley whom I adopted about a month after arriving in town.  Sonny (2016 - 2021) Jasper (2016 - 2022) Jasper and Sonny were with me in college and helped me make it through my senior year.  Miley Miley is my shadow. She follows me quietly from room to room and waits for me to sit down. She is slow to trust, but once she does she is loyal and loving. In March of 2019, we met the love of our ...

 I don't remember the exact date my symptoms started, but it was around the middle of April 2021. My friends and I traveled down to Springfield for a much-needed hangout. I remember feeling so much pressure in my head, fogginess, dizziness, and general disorientation. I did my best to push through it. Looking at the picture below, I can see on my face that I'm feeling off.  This first episode lasted around 2 weeks. Dizziness every day, more brain fog...with no relief. My first appointment with a doctor resulted in a diagnosis of Benign Paroxysmal Positional Vertigo or BPPV. I was prescribed meclizine and sent on my way. My episodes of dizziness ebbed and flowed. Some days I woke up feeling "normal" and others were filled with dizziness. That first summer was tough and was only the beginning. The daily dizziness eventually lessened and I experienced more days of "normal" than not, and 2021 turned into 2022.  2022 brought with it new challenges in the health d...